One of those tiny little moments that make my life.. Conversations with my daughter (in mother tongue Telugu)…
Me: Lakshya, what sound does crow make?
Lakshya: Kaav Kaav..
Me: Good. Now tell me how does a Dog sound like?
Lakshya: Dog a? Bhow Bhow..
Me: Nice! Now tell me what does Cuckoo say?
Lakshya: Coo – Coo (almost singing)
Me: (Almost wishful..) What does Lakshya say?
Lakshya: Amma Kaavali.. Amma Kavali anta.
Need I say more?
I never knew this simple phrase would jolt me back into this little world of mine.. Often what you take for granted is the one that requires utmost focus. Feels as if the music played on when I was napping.. Life crawled in slow finesse, whilst I slept unaware. Until.. until someone shook me up and asked my name.
Now what’s in a name? What’s in a name except for a simple attempt to frame an identity. Except for spelling that unique purpose it stands for? Hmm.. Here I am, wondering, what does my name stand for?
I have always taken pride in my this single strong trait of my identity. My confidence in my ability and my trust in my judgment has always been the guiding force in my life. No matter how strong the persuasiveness of life is, my spine has always been straight. What would you do when the whole world stands against you and screams against your conscience and best judgment? Whose side would you take? Would you hold on and stand for what you deem right, or would you give up yourself for the sake of acceptance? Sounds like a tough choice, isn’t it? Somehow I have always believed that One should never leave the side of oneself for the sake of anything, as long as what s/he believes it to be true. Does this echo with you? Do tell me..
In words better described by Gall-up, which I often look upto..
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Self-Assurance is similar to self-confidence. In the deepest part of you, you have faith in your strengths. You know that you are able — able to take risks, able to meet new challenges, able to stake claims, and, most important, able to deliver. But Self-Assurance is more than just self-confidence. Blessed with the theme of Self-Assurance, you have confidence not only in your abilities but in your judgment. When you look at the world, you know that your perspective is unique and distinct. And because no one sees exactly what you see, you know that no one can make your decisions for you. No one can tell you what to think. They can guide. They can suggest. But you alone have the authority to form conclusions, make decisions, and act. This authority, this final accountability for the living of your life, does not intimidate you. On the contrary, it feels natural to you. No matter what the situation, you seem to know what the right decision is. This theme lends you an aura of certainty. Unlike many, you are not easily swayed by someone else’s arguments, no matter how persuasive they may be. This Self-Assurance may be quiet or loud, depending on your other themes, but it is solid. It is strong. Like the keel of a ship, it withstands many different pressures and keeps you on your course.
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Well.. that’s the expression of the day! At least for me.. Somehow this phrase holds a special charm from my perspective today. Has it ever happened to you that you chase a gazillion of dreams over a rolling rainbow for a specific period of time and space only to discard them as worthless stones when that moment of realization twinkles at the corner of the eye? Why is it that all the wishes are endless and all I want is to endup with a little bit of everything in life?
Now, coming to the flavor of the season: its pure work season these days! Yes, days have folded onto months and the definition of time seems to be phasing out of life.. Caught in a race against time, my days are filled in chasing the deadlines which oft fly out of window making me bask in the shimmering afterglow of satisfaction with a delightful chuckle. I am happy, content and have become seemingly immune to everything around me except work. Driven by deadlines.. That just sounds like my tagline these days!
Sometimes, I guess its just best to enjoy the flavor of the season and savor it till it lasts. For, during that weariest part of the day, that tiny weeny dreamer in me still longs for those deliciously gloden sunshine moments of life like idyllic musings, carefree conversations and that warming glow of pals and books. The time for roses would come, all in a moment!
Mumbai was in thought, mind and spirit for the past 100 hours. In those moments of heightened and frenzied activity, my emotions were a big kaleidoscope of mixed colors: of denial, anger, blankness, insecurity, helplessness, and agony of loss.
Digesting the mindless madness of this attempt has been the toughest part of the past week. I was praying for the ruthlessness of the time and mind to commit the horror of the moment to the memory and make me carry on life like business as usual. I guess its the classic escapist nature of the self that lulls one to hope and wish for the better future and life of the countrymen.
Terrorists, Bombs and attacks are not new to us. They are just a part of old news that we deal with in our lifetime. Resilient and united is how our Mumbai janata has always been. They made me proud during the blasts or the floods of the recent times by the way they stood for each other and supported one another. The glorious NSG, Army and Commandos who laid their life on battle to save their fellow countrymen, and those innumerable and countless people of Taj and Oberoi who sacrificed their life in the name of duty, responsibility and honor: You make me proud. You also teach me a lesson in humility, love, respect, honor and duty. I mourn for the senseless loss of you all. May your soul rest in peace and quiet and may your sacrifice remain forever in the mind of people and make way for a positive and better future.
As an Indian, I couldn’t resist myself from quoting this song that’s committed to my memory since childhood days.
‘E Mere Watan Ke Logon, Jara Aankh Me Bharlo Paani
Jo Shaheed Huve Hai Vunki, Jara Yaar Karo Kurbani.’
My eyes are still red with anger, and contempt for the senseless audacity of the monsters and the grief for the destruction of the lives of the people and here we promise that your sacrifice wouldn’t go waste in lighting candles or tea time discussions of Mumbai blasts but would be committed to memory and reflected in actions of our fellow men.
This is time for leadership, for action, and commitment from the Government to take India to the progress and security. Dear leaders, do tell us. Could a better intelligence system have avoided this Mumbai Massacre? Could a better planning would have reduced the heavy loss of life that tolls heavily on the conscience of every Indian? Yes, we Indians are resilient and we would bounce back to life faster. But isn’t it your job to ensure and assure that these incidents wouldn’t repeat and rehash themselves in grisly and morbid frequency. Give us a plan, and not just some shoot off the lip condolences and condemnations. I refuse to believe that India, with its rich intellectual horse power can’t learn from this lesson and make plan for the best intelligence and tracking system to deroot the terrorist network. This is the time of action for us to take a stand tall like determined patriots and contribute our share to the betterment of the environment and society at large. This is the time to take time to reflect, cull the lessons, and make a personal plan for contribution to the enhancement of the security, safety and growth of the team called India.
A note to the Monsters:
What appalled me is the gall of those uncultured, vacuous bigots who could kill with smile and with utter disregard to conscience. I wonder how would your so called God permit this frenzied destruction under a larger purpose. What could be the education of your brainwashed asinine monsters whose doctrines permit the ruthless killing of fellow people with reckless abandon in the name of holy war or some messed up ideology to reserve a seat in heaven. Wah, is this your idea of holy war business? What could be holy in taking on defenceless, unprepared, friendly people by surprise and blowing their brains out in a displaced sense of justice? Oh I forget, you peanut brained guys cant be expected to understand concepts like holy, God and justice. Ever tthought about what does your Heaven look like? A mirror of the destruction you created? Of strewn lambs of your fellow men, of debris of the marvels of creation filled with stench of blood and flesh?
Yeah, right. You guys were making a statement: of your empty headed ideologies, of your debased moral sense, cheap values and of the deviousness of the monstrous actions. Just wake up from perdition and watch for yourself. You wanted to our national monument to bit the dust? You would see the Taj standing proud and tall, living to tell the courageous tale of the ordeal. I can see it back to its feet better and beautiful in weeks. You wanted to instill fear in the heart of the business of India? Go check, for the city of Mumbai is back on its feet, with those crowded metro stations and with tonnes of people making a statement of courage as they brush past the terror and walk up to a purposeful Monday with determination. You wanted to cripple India’s growth? We might miss some tourist dollars, but haven’t you already noticed the the vadapav centres getting busied up on the streets in utter disregard for your brutish actions. Nothing and no-one can stop the tenacity and the persistence of the Indians that make my country. It’s just another day for us, to conquer life and the world at large.
I know it might sound a little strange, yet am compelled by this innate curiosity to understand what people define as love. Our lives run like a poetry of love, for its in love that we grow, evolve and rise up to our potential of what we are and what can we be. My definition and understanding of love has changed over years, and though how much ever I love to give an expression to that emotion, silence always beats me by a great margin.
What do we promise when we say ‘I Love You’? Are we creating an obligation for others to live up to or a promise for me to honor? Or it simply a heartfelt expression of intense emotion? Am left oft confused. All those happily in love, indifferent from its charms and those engaged in pursuit, do pitch in for I would love to hear what you want to say in this.
Now don’t wonder about the context of this question. I am just a plain Jane who having lived through a quarter century, is desparately trying to get her basics right. Probably, all I want deep down in my heart, is to be loved just a little more.
Those are big words. They are also the most often used/abused words in my dictionary. You would often catching me rolling it off with a careless regard oft to myself and often in generic conversations that go around the world.
Come think of it, there are many things that offer comfort in moments of insanity drives. It could be a pack of chocolates, a piece of soothing music, my favorite workspace, or the cozy comfort of an enjoyable book that often comes to rescue offering serene solitude and sweet freedom in the world of my own making. Yet, Cooing up long enough in those little spaces can make one forget the terrible purpose of being for it hinders the ability to dare and heed to the passion call to risk everything for something that we hold close to heart.
Sometimes I feel as if I am so away from my own self that it takes me a while to call for rescue. What so often made for lingering comfort couldn’t assert its existence anymore. Of all the paradoxical pursuits of life, have you ever experienced this urge to deny those little alcoves of comfort in search of something whose essence you haven’t grasped so far?
I could be one of the most disinterested participants that I know in tracking the Beijing Olympics. I still remember the rapture with which my Mom watched the launch of Beijing Olympics when I played Solitaire in my room. Yet, the spirit of passion always lingers on those who come in touch with it. I couldn’t resist but cheer for Abhinav Bindra or catch up with the verve of the participants and their spirit to succeed against all odds.
For some, its a great example of the best of sporting spirit at display, whilst for some its just do or die. As we attempt and persist, so we excel. As we test the limits, so we bring out those incremental improvements that drive towards excellence. Some how the Olympics motto ‘Citius, Altius, Fortius’, Latin for ‘Swifter, Higher, Stronger’ makes perfect sense. Swifter than what we are currently, higher than what we can aim and stronger than what we think is possible. Testing the limits of endurance, and teaching that excellence is when we persist in besting ourselves with each attempt, whilst respecting the spirit of sportsmanship and sharing the joy with everyone around us. The spirit of participation shimmering over the highs of triumphs and the quagmires of losses. Such a powerful message packed in such small motto. Some how, it lingered.
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After about six hours of tiring ride from Bangalore, we landed in this paradise. A little drizzle, coconut grooves, mountain bikes, tiled cottages, overlooking the Kabini riverside, chirping birds, cozy hammocks, gentle wafting breeze.. What could I ask for more? Enveloped in the lazy comfort of nature, I discovered the pleasure of doing nothing.
Somehow strangely, it made me nostalgic of my quaint little town Rajahmundry that overlooks the serene Godavari. For sometime, I tried to convince myself I am not living my dream.
I guess its been a long time since my mind and soul are this quiet.. Coming here made me realize how desperately I needed this break. 🙂 I basked in the sheer pleasure of relaxing by the riverside and indulging in the simple activities. What I loved the most? Let me count..
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Cycling by the riverside
Its been a long time since I last cycled in the woods. Biking along the uneven roads, doing the balancing act, rushing uphill and enjoying the pull of the downward ride, rush of adrenaline, and the enveloping calmth afterward.. Is that a cyclist’s high?
Lazing in the Hammock
Away from civilization, and yet so near to all the modern comforts. That’s the blend of experience that you get in resorts located in pristine locations. I must have spent some quality hours on this hammock by the riverside, in the soothing symphony of the birds.
Jeep Safari by the Nagarhole National Park
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Jungle Safari by the river side, along the sides of Kabini River is a refreshing journey in the wilderness, especially in the wilderness. We spotted herds of agile deers sprinting over the grasslands, and some wild elephants too. At the end of the trip, we did stop at a place where domesticated elephants are groomed. What struck me was the huge difference in their body language. A wild elephant looks spirited and in ease with the life and self, whilst the domesticated elephant looks much more resigned with life in spirit and action. That’s a serious thought to ponder there, for somehow, I had a feeling that these animals would anyday trade a risky life of freedom in wilderness where they had to fight for survival every moment, to a sheltered and secured life of bondage. Now I wonder, why do we act different and pretend that we are insanely wise, trading our life’s longings and dreams to conventional wisdom? Somehow, spotting those wood spirits soothed my soul like nothing could, especially on a lovely morning.
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A Place That Spells Peace..
And lives upto it too. No blaring horns, no loud music, all you can find is the sound of silence and your own heart beat. I loved being there for a weekend, and could only bring back those beautiful memories of paradise.
Haunted by my dreams, this post is a result of midnight musings, after I soothed my frayed nerves by a short chat with my papa. These days I realized that dreams are my deepest desires which I have never acknowledged. Its like those persistant voices which never got a chance, and hence they manifest in the eerie visions of the dreamland when our resistance to logically refute is at all time low. Most of the things I dream are either about things that I heard of, or things that I want to happen or stories that I read somewhere. Those some of these often take me by surprise, they would laos make me believe that I am what I dream. But dreaming alone won’t achieve what I long for, right? May be I don’t live my dreams because I live my fears. May be, I magnify my fears with the thinking mind and lull the heart’s desire with cold reason.
My experience of dreams goes a long way back.. Most of my dreams weave those ‘what if’ sequences about the opportunities that life presents. Some of them could be about me visualizing how would it look if I try bungee jumping or about how would life be in a different career, or about how is an ordinary day in a new environment. Yet, these are what make me come to terms with my anxieties and facts of lifewhile making me comfortable with the fear from the unknown.
And there are those creative dreams either about the stories I heard, movies I partly saw or books that I read somewhere. One of those vivid childhood dreams that stayed with me, is this dream of Ramayana, that started from where the Hanuman brings the sanjeevani to the end of war. I distinctly remember this, for I stayed long in bed so that this dream finds its end. Well, there are dreams where I played wild roles, like a daredevil detective, or a super woman, but let me assure you, these are quite rare. Its been long time since I played the batwoman. 🙂 Yet, the kick of these dreams lies in the way I could manipulate those sequences, or even create them to my satisfaction.
And then there are those dreams that helped me overcome my fears. In childhood, I have always been afraid of things like loosing family members or snakes. I am not sure if I overcome any of those fears. But I remember those dreams which made me run till I made a choice to pick a stick and fight or those that portrayed loss of loved ones and taught me to appreciate their value in life.
But of all these dreams that I had, I never felt as if I am an inactive participant. I have always, (ok, I concede) most of the times, been able to direct my dream to my desired end or end it before it turns wild. May be that’s why I never had such a predominant nightmare which became a permanent memory.
Somehow I believe that dreamland is the space where we touch the threshold of our potential and visualize the realization of our deepest desires. Some stop there, reveling in the beauty of their dreams and basking in vicarious satisfaction; while some hold on and make it a reality in this material world.
I don’t think I have a theory about what I dream, but somehow writing about them did lighten my thought at this late hour. If you are reading this, tell me about your dreams. Would love to hear about the extent and expanse of your imagined universe. Even if you don’t want to talk about it in public space, it’s ok. At least acknowledge them to yourself in solitude, else you would end up being haunted by dreams, just the way I was.
P.S. Whenever I think of dreams, I couldn’t help but muse on here, for in vague sense, it gives me hope.
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Inaugural Speech by Chetan Bhagat for the new batch at the Symbiosis BBA program 2008
Good Morning everyone and thank you for giving me this chance to speak to you. This day is about you. You, who have come to this college, leaving the comfort of your homes (or in some cases discomfort), to become something in your life. I am sure you are excited. There are few days in human life when one is truly elated. The first day in college is one of them. When you were getting ready today, you felt a tingling in your stomach. What would the auditorium be like, what would the teachers be like, who are my new classmates – there is so much to be curious about. I call this excitement, the spark within you that makes you feel truly alive today. Today I am going to talk about keeping the spark shining. Or to put it another way, how to be happy most, if not all the time.
Where do these sparks start? I think we are born with them. My 3-year old twin boys have a million sparks. A little Spiderman toy can make them jump on the bed. They get thrills from creaky swings in the park. A story from daddy gets them excited. They do a daily countdown for birthday party – several months in advance – just for the day they will cut their own birthday cake.
I see students like you, and I still see some sparks. But when I see older people, the spark is difficult to find. That means as we age, the spark fades. People whose spark has faded too much are dull, dejected, aimless and bitter. Remember Kareena in the first half of Jab We Met vs the second half? That is what happens when the spark is lost. So how to save the spark?
Imagine the spark to be a lamp’s flame. The first aspect is nurturing – to give your spark the fuel, continuously. The second is to guard against storms.
To nurture, always have goals. It is human nature to strive, improve and achieve full potential. In fact, that is success. It is what is possible for you. It isn’t any external measure – a certain cost to company pay package, a particular car or house.
Most of us are from middle class families. To us, having material landmarks is success and rightly so. When you have grown up where money constraints force everyday choices, financial freedom is a big achievement.
But it isn’t the purpose of life. If that was the case, Mr Ambani would not show up for work. Shah Rukh Khan would stay at home and not dance anymore. Steve Jobs won’t be working hard to make a better iPhone, as he sold Pixar for billions of dollars already. Why do they do it? What makes them come to work everyday?
They do it because it makes them happy. They do it because it makes them feel alive. Just getting better from current levels feels good. If you study hard, you can improve your rank. If you make an effort to interact with people, you will do better in interviews. If you practice, your cricket will get better. You may also know that you cannot become Tendulkar, yet. But you can get to the next level. Striving for that next level is important.
Nature designed with a random set of genes and circumstances in which we were born. To be happy, we have to accept it and make the most of nature’s design. Are you? Goals will help you do that.
I must add, don’t just have career or academic goals. Set goals to give you a balanced, successful life. I use the word balanced before successful. Balanced means ensuring your health, relationships, mental peace are all in good order.
There is no point of getting a promotion on the day of your breakup. There is no fun in driving a car if your back hurts. Shopping is not enjoyable if your mind is full of tensions.
You must have read some quotes – Life is a tough race, it is a marathon or whatever. No, from what I have seen so far, life is one of those races in nursery school. Where you have to run with a marble in a spoon kept in your mouth. If the marble falls, there is no point coming first. Same with life, where health and relationships are the marble. Your striving is only worth it if there is harmony in your life. Else, you may achieve the success, but this spark, this feeling of being excited and alive, will start to die.
One last thing about nurturing the spark – don’t take life seriously. One of my yoga teachers used to make students laugh during classes. One student asked him if these jokes would take away something from the yoga practice. The teacher said – don’t be serious, be sincere. This quote has defined my work ever since. Whether its my writing, my job, my relationships or any of my goals. I get thousands of opinions on my writing everyday. There is heaps of praise, there is intense criticism. If I take it all seriously, how will I write? Or rather, how will I live? Life is not to be taken seriously, as we are really temporary here. We are like a pre-paid card with limited validity. If we are lucky, we may last another 50 years. And 50 years is just 2,500 weekends. Do we really need to get so worked up? It’s ok, bunk a few classes, goof up a few interviews, fall in love. We are people, not programmed devices.
I’ve told you three things – reasonable goals, balance and not taking it too seriously that will nurture the spark. However, there are four storms in life that will threaten to completely put out the flame. These must be guarded against. These are disappointment, frustration, unfairness and loneliness of purpose.
Disappointment will come when your effort does not give you the expected return. If things don’t go as planned or if you face failure. Failure is extremely difficult to handle, but those that do come out stronger. What did this failure teach me? is the question you will need to ask. You will feel miserable. You will want to quit, like I wanted to when nine publishers rejected my first book. Some IITians kill themselves over low grades – how silly is that? But that is how much failure can hurt you.
But it’s life. If challenges could always be overcome, they would cease to be a challenge. And remember – if you are failing at something, that means you are at your limit or potential. And that’s where you want to be.
Disappointment’s cousin is frustration, the second storm. Have you ever been frustrated? It happens when things are stuck. This is especially relevant in India. >From traffic jams to getting that job you deserve, sometimes things take so long that you don’t know if you chose the right goal. After books, I set the goal of writing for Bollywood, as I thought they needed writers. I am called extremely lucky, but it took me five years to get close to a release.
Frustration saps excitement, and turns your initial energy into something negative, making you a bitter person. How did I deal with it? A realistic assessment of the time involved – movies take a long time to make even though they are watched quickly, seeking a certain enjoyment in the process rather than the end result – at least I was learning how to write scripts , having a side plan – I had my third book to write and even something as simple as pleasurable distractions in your life – friends, food, travel can help you overcome it. Remember, nothing is to be taken seriously. Frustration is a sign somewhere, you took it too seriously.
Unfairness – this is hardest to deal with, but unfortunately that is how our country works. People with connections, rich dads, beautiful faces, pedigree find it easier to make it – not just in Bollywood, but everywhere. And sometimes it is just plain luck. There are so few opportunities in India, so many stars need to be aligned for you to make it happen. Merit and hard work is not always linked to achievement in the short term, but the long term correlation is high, and ultimately things do work out. But realize, there will be some people luckier than you.
In fact, to have an opportunity to go to college and understand this speech in English means you are pretty darn lucky by Indian standards. Let’s be grateful for what we have and get the strength to accept what we don’t. I have so much love from my readers that other writers cannot even imagine it. However, I don’t get literary praise. It’s ok. I don’t look like Aishwarya Rai, but I have two boys who I think are more beautiful than her. It’s ok. Don’t let unfairness kill your spark.
Finally, the last point that can kill your spark is isolation. As you grow older you will realize you are unique. When you are little, all kids want Ice cream and Spiderman. As you grow older to college, you still are a lot like your friends. But ten years later and you realize you are unique. What you want, what you believe in, what makes you feel, may be different from even the people closest to you. This can create conflict as your goals may not match with others. . And you may drop some of them. Basketball captains in college invariably stop playing basketball by the time they have their second child. They give up something that meant so much to them. They do it for their family. But in doing that, the spark dies. Never, ever make that compromise. Love yourself first, and then others.
There you go. I’ve told you the four thunderstorms – disappointment, frustration, unfairness and isolation. You cannot avoid them, as like the monsoon they will come into your life at regular intervals. You just need to keep the raincoat handy to not let the spark die.
I welcome you again to the most wonderful years of your life. If someone gave me the choice to go back in time, I will surely choose college. But I also hope that ten years later as well, you eyes will shine the same way as they do today. That you will Keep the Spark alive, not only through college, but through the next 2,500 weekends. And I hope not just you, but my whole country will keep that spark alive, as we really need it now more than any moment in history. And there is something cool about saying – I come from the land of a billion sparks.
Thank You.
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As a sheer wave of nostalgia hits me in this sunny Sunday afternoon, I couldn’t help but muse on all those lovely moments of my life.. Yes, Indeed I miss
Umm.. How I long for a little drizzle of joy or a time machine… Suddenly this whole business of playing the adult isn’t that appealing any more.
Somehow I just loved this movie!
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Its been indeed long time since I watched a Telugu Movie devoid of hyped up movie cast full of gusting hotheaded action. And how I loved it! The current Tollywood Industry doles out umpteen releases every week almost with reverence to quantity over quality, out of which I spot rare gems like this once in six months or an year.
Now, playing the spoilsport, let me unveil the plot a little. Abhiram (played by Sharwanand), a spoiled rich brat who saw the world through the glass doors, discovers a real life out of the window panes when he embarks a bike journey to get back his lady love Janaki (played by Kamlinee Mukherjee, my favorite :-)). Janaki, an orphan and a idealist who believes in playing the good samaritan dumps Abhiram, when she realizes that he couldn’t support or share her idealism or values. Abhiram takes off on his bike in pursuit of Janaki, who went on a doctor’s camp to remote areas, and thus comes in close contact with humanity. In pursuit of his ladylove, he discovers himself. By standing for friends and by fighting for what he believes, Abhiram discovers the essence of life, as the self realization dawns on him over the end of the long winding journey.
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Now, the story is not just about breaking and making it up by the lead couple. This movie is a celebration of life, realization, introspection and humanity. Words would sure flat to elaborate the performance of Allari Naresh as Gaali Sreenu. Gaali Sreenu, a petty thief, teams up with Abhiram in his pursuit of love and shows him the real world in the hinterlands. With a serious theme that explores the divide between the ‘Haves’ and ‘Have-nots’, this movie packs an ample punch of comic relief that cheers one up while engaging the audience in serious reflection. Abhiram discovers life, death, friendship, honor, values, humanity, and loss over the journey and finds himself as a socially responsible citizen when he meets his destination of love.
I would recommend this to anyone who wants to catch a meaningful Telugu Movie that does a great job of being an entertainer. Kudos to the new director Rama Krishna for this marvelous movie.
P.S. I read that this movie is inspired by ‘The Motorcycle Diaries’. I haven’t watched the original, and hence am clueless on whether this movie is a copy or an inspiration of the original. Yet, its a great movie with some natural performances to save it for keeps.
[W]hen the first baby laughed for the first time, its laugh broke into a thousand pieces, and they all went skipping about, and that was the beginning of fairies. And now when every new baby is born its first laugh becomes a fairy. So there ought to be one fairy for every boy or girl. ~James Matthew Barrie, Peter Pan
For all I need to make this true is only to believe it to be true.. Guess I am caught in the beauty of this thought. 🙂
Found this in a Pamphlet for the play “the Woman in Me’ by Pawan. Its hosted at Ranga Shankara, Bangalore at 7:30 PM on 17,18, 19th July 2008.
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A Mirror tells the truth! Isn’t that a lie? Stand in the front of a mirror and look to your right, where does the reflection look? It looks to the left! You raise your right hand and it raises its left. A mirror only tells you the opposite!
Our lives are depended on the sotries that we build of our past. Some are true and some are just subconsciously made up.
I wonder sometimes, what really happens? How much of what I feel and what I see is really happening the same way? How different is “Reality” from the way I perceive it?
Is the color Red really red?
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That’s indeed a compelling writeup for a play. Am tempted to check it out.
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I never thought I would actually dedicate a thought to this movie ‘Saawariya’, on which I am still undecided on my reaction. I don’t think I would ever be able to take a stand on whether I loved the movie or hated it. That’s because I shared both these feelings in equal measure. Saawariya is a beautiful vision without imagination, a splendid fare of visual poetry without gravity, a charming seductress without soul and is filled with delusional love that is evoked by the lackluster admixture of scintillating idealistic dreamworld with the brazen harshness of reality. Yet, what remains with me at the end of the movie are those poignant and oddly affecting richly detailed visuals. Hence this post is filled with them.
When I look back, what often resonates with real life for me is the storyline though. Set in a dreamland (does any of those settings look anywhere near reality? ), the movie paints in richer intricacy, the pining of Sakina for the mystery love of her life Imaan, ignoring the starry eyed devotion she receives from Raj aka Saawariya. Sakina is cloyingly sweet, achingly hollow and an innocent manipulator who plays with the tender feelings of the eternally optimistic Raj while allowing him to cling to the delusion of her love. I couldn’t credit her with one identity for she plays the hopeless romantic perfectly pining for her illusionary love at first sight, whilst transforming herself as a coy temptress in the presence of Raj bewitching him with her innocent yearning for the love unattained.
Fused identities, conflicting ideologies, stark contrasts between the imagined universe and the dark reality, and the never ending fight between idealistic yearning and realistic possibilities: these are the Saawariya movie’s recurrent themes. Yet, though this movie feels like a piece out of a dream sequence, some of those characters feel so darkly real. Engulfed in perplexity, I notice so many Sakinas’ in reality much to my discomfort. People bartering dreams for materialistic pleasures are one extreme, whilst those trading realistic positive encounters of finding selfless love for the lure of illusionary and obsessive yearnings is another extreme.
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Sometimes when I chat with my peers, I can often imagine them trapped in their own multi dimentional wonderland awaiting for their Perfect Soulmates. Princesses and Damsels in distress living in fairytale world, yearning for their Prince Charming to ride to their rescue and sweep them off their feet, often failing to acknowledge that life is happening around them. Sometimes its so difficult to identify which group they belong to: people who are in love or people who are in love with the idea of being in love. Sometimes the bubble of illusion, that they comfortably ensconce themselves in, wouldn’t equip them for the real life experiences.
Whenever we swap ideas on the things that are meaningful to us in life, we realize that we are goaded either by instinct or intellect. Life is all about tough choices and we all choose based on our own value systems. I just hope that the fairy tale romantic notions doesn’t spoil people at their chances of serendipity. The lure of nihilism is a dark temptation that envelops us if we dwell in dreams and forget to live. The wait may be on, yet, lets not forget that no one is perfect: me, you, and all those prince charmings and the knights in shimmering armour are armed with our own limitations and idiosyncrasies. We might as well be better of rescuing ourselves from those clout of dreams and the deep schism that the intersection of these virtual and real worlds present.
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I can only seal this piece of muse by quoting from my favorite song from Pardon Dolly:
““Watching the girl I’m reminded
she’s quite a lot like me
Trapped in the suburbs of wonderland,
lost in her own fantasy
Somehow my heart never grew up,
no one ever burst my balloon
So here I am swirling in star dust
slow dancing with the moon”
A few moments celebrated..
I am not one of those people who love hanging around coffee shops indulging in coffee and conversations. Yet, this Barista coffee shop at the Barton Centre on M.G. Road in Bangalore really treated me with the right kind of music and a beautiful ambiance on a lazy evening.
Here is a view from outside. (Looks like any plain coffee shop, isn’t it?)
(Photo Courtesy: http://www.flickr.com/photos/damp/)
What delighted me was the beauty of a serene recess that this open air coffee shop offers from the traffic humdrum right in the heart of M.G. area. I took to my heart’s content the gentle breeze and the peppy music along with fun filled company. Here I am, gladly thanking Barista for the great time I had there.
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Here is where we seated. Our private alcove from the hectic traffic reality. 🙂 A step inside can assure you a great time if you are with the right company. The music is just apt for a chilled out discussion with good pals. But make sure you give the order at the counter, for rarely you find any waiters roaming with the Menu. We sat there for an hour happily chatting and noone offered us Menu, and slowly it dawned on us that its a self-service coffee shop. 🙂
Coffee, Conversations, Breeze and Music, just apt for my idea of a perfect evening. Looks can be deceptive, isn’t it?
This time I started with the title first, and as soon as I keyed it in, it sounded darn preachy! Especially when I have the Accenture core values pamphlet in front of me that has features the title as one of the core values. 🙂 Yet, it has been a lingering thought since sometime, and I have some interesting anecdotes to share.
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Now that I mentioned Accenture, let me start with my induction programme that happened some months back. We were allotted some 2 hours session for discussion around this particular core value. Incidentally, this was I think the last session of the day and all of the participants were tired. The faculty walks in. The first question he posed to the listless audience was: “how much time do you all give to me?”. Someone answered 30 minutes. He quietly agrees and announces that this is ‘respect for individual’. I couldn’t help but burst clapping in appreciation. Yes. Indeed, he closed the session within agreed time and I did carry the message home. 🙂
One of my favorite anecdotes in office humor has been about ‘biscuit’. Though we often kid about the incident in lighter note, it did generate a serious thought too. It all happened in one of those office treks, where we are buying food stuff for snacking en route. One of the teammates wanted to pick some biscuits for it and he was made fun by some folks of being kiddish for his food choice. It is very easy to get carried away in light hearted banter. Most often, humor generated is at the expense of someone, especially in groups. Finally, that poor chap didn’t pick his biscuits and that did leave that feeling of denial with us.
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Yet, that incident did trigger a new dictum in the gang, which we call by name biscuit. A rule to abide by the respective individual choices instead of succumbing to group think. And it did offer me some interesting experiences too. Respecting somebody’s interest in Art and Theatre did take me to ‘Water Lilies’, ‘Natyalakshana’ or ‘Don Muttuswami’, some of which I throughly enjoyed. “What’s your biscuit?”, this question that often happens among us, whilst we are thinking about weekend plans, often sounds like music. The idea of group coming to individual and celebrating independent thoughts, instead of individual interests being drowned in group is charming. And Yes. No one is denied of biscuit these days. 🙂
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In early 18th century in Peru, a famous suspension footbridge over a deep gorge broke and took the lives of five people into the gulf below. After this unfortunate accident, Brother Juniper is haunted by the question: “Why did this happen to those five?” As quoted in the book: If there were any plan in the universe at all, if there were any pattern in a human life, surely it could be discovered mysteriously latent in those lives so suddenly cut off. Either we live by accident and die by accident, or we live by plan and die by plan. Pondering over the cosmic order, Brother Juniper investigates the secret lives of those five people in rich detail in an attempt to discover the reason behind their demise.
Here is when Thornton Wilder excels in introducing us to the intimate details of those five people who seem to be united only in their longing for acceptance, and love. There is a rich, aristocratic and elderly Marquesa suffering from unrequited maternal love and pangs of loneliness, spends her time composing brilliant and elaborate letters to her cold hearted daughter Clara in Spain. Accompanying her is little Pepita, an bewildered and distressed teenage orphan girl trying to live up to the high expectations of an Abbesses who is grooming her as a successor. There is Esteban, the poor twin who is left alone and bereft in an uncomprehending world after his twin brother dies. Uncle Pio is a wise wanderer, a man of exceptional talent who has devoted the best part of his life for the flourishing career of actress Camila Perichole. He becomes disappointed when actress Camila Perichole renounces her stage career for becoming a Lady and shuns herself from the world when she contracts small pox. Uncle Pio requests Camila Perichole to send her youngest sickly son Jamie with him to Lima so that he could educate the boy into a gentleman. Little Jaime joins his Uncle Pio only to loose his life on the fated bridge.
The relationship between the identical twin brothers Manuel and Esteban, when Manuel falls in love with actress Camila Perichole is beautifully highlighted here. “Now he discovered that secret from which one never quite recovers, that even in the most perfect love one person loves less profoundly than the other. There may be two equally good, equally gifted, equally beautiful, but there may never be two that love one another equally well.”
The beauty of this book lies in the description of these five characters. Thornton puts to use all the finery of the English language to delicately highlight the nuances of these five central characters. Sample these observations on Marquesa’s Son-in-Law. “the Conde delighted in her letters, but he thought that when he had enjoyed the style he had extracted all their richness and intention, missing (as most readers do) the whole purport of literature, which is the notation of the heart.”
Though we still are not sure whether the loss of these five people is by accident or by divine intention, this final words from Abbess sums up the meaning of love in life: “But soon we shall die and all memory of those five will have left earth, and we ourselves shall be loved for a while and forgotten. But the love will have been enough; all those impulses of love return to the love that made them. Even memory is not necessary for love. There is a land of the living and a land of the dead and the bridge is love, the only survival, the only meaning.”
Many a times, our life is filled with chance encounters with engaging strangers who leave lasting impressions or thought provoking reflections as they touch our lives in accident. Ever wondered what binds those conversations together? What compels us to connect to those strangers from diverse backgrounds and worlds and what propels us to spill our deep experiences of life which we seldom share with those with whom we spend our life with?
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The play ‘Water Lilies’ is filled with a set of random sparkling conversations between people from diverse backgrounds who meet in random at public places.. Staged as a trilogy of three short plays: Fawn Lilies, Water Lilies and Black Lilies, this play explores the strange tranquility that envelops us as we strike kinship with the world around us. In these short plays, a man and a woman from diverse backgrounds and radically different outlook that springs from their distinct racial origins share their world of experiences and differences only to discover a strange affinity through common values, leaving each other with a fresh set of perspectives and a new meaning behind things. What enriching reflection can happen over a harmless conversation in thirty minutes with an absolute stranger from the other part of the world? One has to watch this play to believe it.
Fawn Lilies: Set in a Park in Columbus, Ohio, a bird-watching dietitian from Vijayawada, whose boyfriend decides to give up love for war, meets a gay vagabond with a cynical feel for causes. The characterization of the female protagonist ‘Sunandha Ragunathan’ do sound like a bundle of contradictions for coming from the same place, it was a little hard for me to imagine “a bird-watching dietitian from Vijayawada”, sprouting a tattoo on her forearm and a dainty umbrella for accessory. Yet, what makes the play beautiful was the lilting quality of the conversations that shimmer with a soulful introspection. The gay wanderer shares his experiences of being a part of tree sitting movement while pondering on his vagabond nature. Trying to cope with the loss of her boy friend and childhood sweetheart, she finds comfort in taking up her boyfriend’s passion for birds, trying to hold on to those lost memories. As they spill these little details of their life and collect those life long reflections in an enticing conversation, the play ends with a poem called ‘Fawn-Lilies’ by Ashton Smith that celebrates a sense of positivity in the bloom of fawn lilies that sprang from a swamp.
Fawn-Lilies By Clark Ashton Smith
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White lilies frail and cold,
With hearts of elfin gold;
Briefer than all brief things your hidden bloom,
Beneath the sombre grove –
Mournful, and dear, and fair as hapless love,
Foreknowing all the nearness of its doom.
White lilies cool and shy,
Delicously ye die,
Before the vesper dews of any morrow!
But now, on windless air,
Your perfume lies, fresh as a woman’s hair,
And faint as myrrh the dreams of noon would borrow.
White lilies cold and wan
As hands of swooming love –
As the fair throat whereon
My kisses clomb, to find her mouth’s lit flame! –
Ye die, and cannot say
Who passed beneath the April pines today;
And you alone have heard our hidden love,
And known her flow’r-soft name.
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Water Lilies: Dismissing Claude Monet as a painter of pretty flowers, a Texan investment banker becomes curious about a Srilankan woman’s passion for Monet’s lilyscapes at Monet Exhibition, Houston Museum. When V.Balakrishnan as a Texan Banker subtly mocks Monnet’s landscapes, Swarnamalya as a sari-clad Srilankan woman etches a perfect picture of serene beauty and magnificent dignity, as she passionately highlights the subtle nuances of Monnet’s paintings that elevate art beyond colors and reach out to the vision of the painter. The play ends with the Banker musing on the last words of the poem by Ted Hughes, that highlights the serene tranquility of the water lilies despite of the horrors that surround their roots.
To Paint A Lily Flower By Ted Hughes
Ignorant of age as of hour—
Now paint the long-necked lily-flower
Which, deep in both worlds, can be still
As a painting, trembling hardly at all
Though the dragonfly alight,
Whatever horror nudge her root
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Black Lilies: Set in Washington Dulles Airport, two days after the 9/11 tragedy, a young school teacher from Tamil Nadu, on her first foreign trip, strikes a conversation with a Serbo-Hungarian novelist, who is on his way to meet his German translator in Frankfurt. Partly amused and partly irritated by her diffidence and irrational fear about everything from thunder to travel, the novelist shares a piece of his dark stories, only to discover faith and belief in her shy and affirmative convictions. Dhritiman Chaterji embodies the nobel award novelist with beautifully packed wit, passion, and poignant reflection in fluid and carefree ease. He makes you think, laugh and ache as he recites his story and comments on her beliefs. Parteeksha, as the Tamil school teacher matches the novelist with her shy and confident delivery of her convictions and opinions which contrast sharply with the novelist’s ideology. As they share their world of differences, they collectively discover hope, joy, light and happiness that leads the discussion from darkness to light.
Gowri Ramnarayan creates magical moments of introspection by her careful choice of words and her eminent direction. She should be credited for judiciously blending poetry, verse and paintings to enhance the swaying moods of the conversations. Anil Srinivasan with his mellifluous piano performance blends wonderfully into the play, linking the stories and ephemeral thoughts together with his transient and haunting music. His dulcet tunes match the poignant thought process that runs behind those conversations and subtly elevate the moods of the protagonists.
I marveled at the competence of the cast that enlivened the theatre and made those moments eternal in my memories. The play did leave me with moments of nostalgia of all those soulful chance encounters I had with engaging people, some who stayed on to be friends for life, while some dropped in to offer life long reflections in those fleeting moments.
Something that caught my eye today. With the help of a GPS device equipped suitcase and DHL, Eric Nordenankar attempts a self protrait by recreating the paths the suitcase traveled. There are really no boundaries to human imagination or potential!
This Saturday was quite eventful with the SmartTechie’s Startup City Event happening at NIMHANS Convention Centre in Bangalore. I was about to collect my notes, but a little bit of googling helped me land up at Swaroop’s notes on the event which captured the essence of the event in a remarkable fashion.
Here are those aspects of the event that I loved most. R.K.Misra is positively charging and I loved Ashish Gupta’s keen insightful address that traced the evolution of startups. His perspective of looking at India as a huge startup offered a great food for thought. The panel discussion focussed on Innovation Marketing was moderated by Dr. Y L R Moorthi – IIMB professor of marketing. Some of Moorthi’s candid remarks like
‘Marketing is too serious a stuff to leave it to Marketing professors or Marketing professionals’
‘Technology has the shelf life of a banana’
got me thinking. How true!
The Marketing Panel discussion was quite insightful as Paul Murphy, Director of Innovation, Microsoft India emphasized on the importance of Business case, on building products that customer wants, and Marketing in Promoting ideas, Bharath Chinamanthur from Amazon India Development Center and Suresh Vedula, Head – Business Mobility,from Nokia India expounded on their experiences. Sharad Sharma proved to be a great moderator in the CEO Conclave. Overall, this event surpassed my expectations!
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I came across this link yesterday. Its a list published of all time top 100 Novels published since 1923 by TIME Magazine in 2005. Apparently, it took me 3 years to discover it. A quick glance through the list highlighted 15 titles that I am familiar with and also introduced me to a world of 85 books and authors whom I never heard of. Going by the experience of those 15 which I loved, my expectations on the rest 85 are really sky high.
And so began a book fetish to hunt these books. I spent some quality hours tracking these books and I can say that I have around 40 of them in my collection now. 🙂
For those Ebook lovers, these Websites offer most of the books in list for free download.
http://www.truly-free.org/
http://www.4shared.com
http://www.esnips.com
http://www.scribd.com
http://avaxsphere.com/ebooks
Apart from grinning like a Cheshire cat, I cannot offer a reason to myself as to why did I spend so much time assembling them together, when I would have read them one by one. For me, greed has a pet name. Books. I feel strangely secure when I am around books that I haven’t discovered. Peculiar Behavior, isn’t it? Am planning to read 50 of the list by Feb 2009 and hopefully share the experience here. Wish me luck, for its a stretch goal, even for me. 🙂
When Was The Last Time That I Did Something For the First Time?
I attended a dance performance by Natyalakshana, called ‘The Fires Within’ which was sponsored by Bosch Cultural Events at Chowdaiah Memorial Hall this Friday. For those who were wondering about my new found interest in traditional art forms, I have to ascribe due credit to those unconventional inspirations that result from boredom.
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And how glad I was that my whim took me there. How I thanked my friends for their exotic and audacious suggestion to take me there! The show was a beautiful symphony of music, dance and art, where flying feet gave voice to age old legends. The legendary poems represented are selected verses from Rabindranath Tagore’s ‘Gitanjali’, Bharathiyar’s ‘Dikku Theriyada Katil’ and a few selection of Mirza Ghalib’s poetry in Kathak. I loved the ‘Dikku Theriyada Katil’ and Ghalib’s poetry representation, where I felt that the dancers delivered a magnificent justice to the poems.
Shama and Sanjay’s ‘Dikku Theriyada Katil’ and Hari and Chandana’s ‘Mirza Ghalib piece’ had a delicate balance of perfection and expression and they held me in rapture through out. The dance drama that followed, called Tagore’s ‘Tasher Desh’ was a little bit disappointing, but the blame rests with my expectations which reached the sky by the end of the first two performances. If I have to define the experience, words would surely fail me as I am running short of superlatives. I could never realize that poetry could be so brilliantly enticing and soul wrenching. I was swaying in a world, so out of myself and the feeling is liberating. I believe that the credit of those beautiful moments goes to those on back stage as well. A special mention for Usha Venkateshwaran, the director of Natyalakshana who choreographed and produced the dances. Simone for the wonderful sway of lights and Sri Gurumurthy and Ustad Faizal Khan for their mellifluous music.
This event did make me reflect on my opinions towards conventional art forms. For to achieve perfection in blending, a music so divine, a dance that lent life to poetry and expressions that tugged heart, it must either have been Divine’s grace or years’ practice. It did teach me a thing or two about the immense beauty that’s submerged in Indian tradition and art. Like a welcome summer rain, my heart kissed the joy and danced along enticed in the magical world of dance, music and poetry. A worthy life long memory that’s for me for keeps.
Here are the translations in English for the Ghalib’s poetry that’s recited in the Event.
“O God Thy blessings on the soul
Whose name just came to my lips.
And as I willed that it be sung,
My speech rained kisses on my tongue.
These images drawn by Thee to make
Thine grand image, this world
Stand there like supplicants bowed in prayer:
Their burden they can’t bear.
The Fire in me, it rages high,
Though I be bound in chains.
The chain rings bounce,for they are light
Like hair all curled by flame
No simile matches her playfulness
And her quick-silver, passionate ways,
For, lighting lacks, by far, her play
And her temper is hotter than a blaze.
It is the nature of love, no doubt:
A kind of freak fire, which
You cannot start just when you wish,
Nor can you put it out.
A fire is raging in my heart
On this lonely night
My own shadow doth run from me
A smoke from fire takes flight.
It is ages since my beloved’s feet
Did cross this poor threshold.
So let her, with her twinkling cups,
Light up my dark abode.
My bustling crowd of desires
Each took my breath away!
Though I could quench many, many of them,
Yet millions remain un-slaked.
Jannat.. Is this it?
These days my mornings are filled with tranquil repose. Such is the sheer morning bliss of waking up into a quiescent paradise marked by perfect harmony that I am indulging in lazy languor. Slowly the alarm at 5:30 AM lost its prominence and I am able to greet the clock and the sun only after another hour flies by the window panes. Now, what eases my conscience is the beautiful Bangalore Morning Weather. If I discount the roars of the street, the cool soothing breeze and the gentle sun rays are perfect for the sunny summers.
Musing on memories, early mornings and the wafting gentle breeze are a part of me since childhood. My pride of being a little town girl springs from the luxury of being softly transported to reality by either the mellifluous chirping of the country birds or by the divinely melodious Suprabhatam. If I was lucky that day, I would even be bribed from the sands of dreamland by my Granny or Mamma with a gentle kiss. Those were the days of contentment, tradition and values. Those are the days when you believe that Goddess Saraswati blesses those who study at Brahma Muhurta (at 4 AM) and soaking the warm Sunrays in the early morning with Surya Namaskara fills one with energy and strength. Though the idea of being stolen from the land of dreams isn’t appealing, the purposeful morning chores fill life with activity and spirit. Often, at home early mornings happen as an act of tradition. Our small home is abuzz with activity by 5 AM and I end up vying for my share in Mamma’s tea.
Those days of simple rhythm and family warmth are so afresh. The custom carries on. Come what may, I rarely miss a chance to greet the Sun in my way, for, I get a sense of being transgressed from an age old value thats been a part of me since childhood, which I humbly followed as an act of reverence to the customs and traditions of generations.
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And there is a special reason behind this title. 🙂 Its a personal moment of happiness for me, as one of my pals found his frog princess over the virtual world. There is an aura of happiness around me, a sense of mirth that surrounds one when something good happens to people you care for. Mood of the moment is commanded by bliss, and here I retire with prayers wishing the best for him.
X: I Am Good At Management…
Me: Why Do You Think So?
X: Umm… I am good at coffee table conversations. I am good at talking to people. My communication skills are super. Top of the world actually. And, finally, I think I am good at coordination (really, any one can schedule meetings and handle logistics! ) and I enjoy doing it.
And finally as the discussion proceeds, I realize that its either the lure of flexible time, or the seemingly easy work that acts as a persistent motivator than the idea of career.
There is a lot of misconception about the so called management roles, at least in the field that I work in. Thought most of the senior people in those roles seem to be doing only talking, preparing pretty presentations, or spending most of their time in meetings, there is lot more under the hood than that meets the eye. One doesn’t account for the years of experience or the knowledge that they are equipped with to handle client demands on the feet, or the experiential insight that they bring in while addressing specific issues. Even bad communicators may have sound understanding or a strategic approach to the problem at hand. We can’t ignore the skills that they bring to the table because someone has bad presentation skills, just the way we can’t give weight for garrulous mouthing of words with little essence.
For those who are contemplating management career or decision making roles, a little bit of soul searching is crucial. List out all the reasons and hidden factors that propel you to consider this option. You can give a load of convincing answers to the world, yet please don’t deceive thyself.
Do you have it in you to face tremendous odds and come out trumps? Can you handle tremendous pressure or do you get fizzled out at the drop of a hat? Do you have the never-say-die spirit or do you give up easily and are driven by the principle of fatalism, i.e. the belief that you don’t have control over your deeds and some external force like God determines that.
After going through these discussions umpteen number of times, and talking to aspiring MBAs my mood turned nostalgic as I leafed through those memories of college days. I am blessed with a great mentor during my engineering days, and I am sharing a piece of those exchanges. These are times when I feel that the basics of these questions hasn’t changed over 5 years.
Why you want to do MBA?
1. Is it for money?
2. Is it for fame?
3. Is it for getting power?
4. Is it for getting a good job?
5. Is it for getting social recognition?
6. Is it because you want to make a career in Management?
7. Is it because you like to take challenges?
8. Is it because you want to broaden your horizons?
9. Is it because you have an academic bent of mind?
10. Is it for the sense of achievement?
11. Is it to get yourself equipped with an additional degree so that you can have an edge in this dog-eat-dog world?
12. Is it because you get turned ON by business and economy like nothing else?
13. Is it because you have nothing else to do?
14. Is it because of peer pressure?
15. Is it just for the sake of it and enjoyment?
16. Is it for making yourself more eligible in the marriage market?
It doesn’t require a great deal of analysis to figure out the secret motivator behind picking brain about management roles. For most of us in corporate field, its unavoidable. As we add on experience to the work life, most of our work or output depends on the deliverables of others. Thats when people management, communication, planning and organization skills come into play. For some, a management degree is a way to break free from the technical roles or a launchpad into different industries. For students, MBA is either a lucrative career option or a way to extend unemployment. ( Pun intended 🙂 )
But for those with mammoth goals and lofty aspirations, I am sharing this piece of advice that I received years ago from my mentor.
“A person doesn’t become a CEO just by doing MBA or just having the desire. The culmination is only due to untiring efforts and careful grooming over many years. Do bear that in mind. Although, having lofty ambitions is laudable, being nervous even before the battle has begun doesn’t behoove you. You need to have the emotional poise to handle things at ease. “
And finally, chill. We are all good at management in one way or the other. We all are managing our lives without much catastrophes. Acquiring management skills isn’t rocket science if we put our mind and heart to it. They say, vision without action is a dream and action without vision is a nightmare. Be true to the choices of life and be true to your dreams and longings. Life will sail on much more easily and happily.
“Never Offer Lame Excuses”..
That was some advice that’s offered by my teacher during my school days that stood the test of the time. This article that I received today in email made me think for some time on the excuses that we mouth at the simplest opportunity.
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Excuses, Excuses
by Marshall Goldsmith, Ph.D.
When Bill Clinton published his best-selling memoir in 2004, he knew he would have to deal with the Monica Lewinsky scandal during his second term. He did so by explaining it as a personal failure, a yielding to private demons.
“Once people reach the age of accountability, no matter what people do to them, that is not an excuse for any mistakes they make. I was involved in two great struggles at the same time: a great public struggle over the future of America with the Republican Congress and a private struggle with my old demons. I won the public one and lost the private one,” Clinton said.
“I don`t think it`s much more complicated than that. That`s not an excuse. But it is an explanation, and that`s the best I can do.”
Clinton understood the distinction – and not just because his behavior was inexcusable. There is simply no excuse for making excuses.
When you`re late to an appointment and you hear yourself saying, “I`m sorry I`m late but the traffic was murder,” stop at the word “sorry.” Blaming traffic doesn`t excuse the fact that you kept people waiting. You should have started earlier. You certainly won`t have to apologize for: “I`m sorry I`m early, but I left too soon and the traffic was moving along just fine.”
If the world worked like that, there would be no excuses.
I like to divide excuses into two categories: blunt and subtle. The blunt, “dog ate my homework” excuse sounds something like this: “I`m very sorry I missed our lunch date. My assistant had it marked down for the wrong day on my calendar.”
Translation: “You see, it`s not that I forgot the lunch date. It`s not that I don`t regard you as so important that lunch with you is the unchangeable, non-negotiable highlight of my day. It`s just that my assistant is inept. Blame my assistant, not me.”
The problem with this type of excuse is that we rarely get away with it – and it`s hardly an effective leadership strategy. After reviewing thousands of 360-degree feedback summaries, I have a feel for what qualities direct reports respect and don`t respect in their leaders. I have never seen feedback that said, “I think you are a great leader because I love the quality of your excuses,” or, “I thought you screwed up, but you really changed my mind after you made that excuse.”
The more subtle excuses appear when we attribute our failings to some genetic characteristic that`s apparently lodged in our brains. We talk about ourselves as if we have permanent genetic flaws that can never be altered.
You`ve surely heard these excuses. Maybe you`ve even used a few of them: “I`m impatient.” “I always put things off until the last minute.” “I`ve always had a quick temper.”
Habitually, these expositional statements are followed by saying, “I`m sorry, but that`s just the way I am.”
It`s amazing how often I hear otherwise brilliant, successful people make willfully self-deprecating comments about themselves. It`s a subtle art because, in effect, they`re stereotyping themselves and using that to excuse otherwise inexcusable behavior.
Our personal stereotyping frequently comes from stories or preconceived notions about ourselves that have been preserved and repeated for years, sometimes going back as far as childhood. These stories may have little or no basis in fact. But they imprint themselves in our minds and establish low expectations that become self-fulfilling prophecies.
The next time you hear yourself saying, “I`m just no good at …,” ask yourself, “Why not?”
This doesn`t just refer to our aptitudes at mathematics or mechanics. It also applies to our behavior. We excuse our tardiness because we`ve been running late all our lives, and our family, friends and colleagues let us get away with it. These aren`t genetic flaws. We weren`t born this way, and we don`t have to be this way.
If we can stop excusing ourselves, we can get better at almost anything we choose.
[About the Author: Dr. Marshall Goldsmith is a world authority in helping successful leaders achieve positive, lasting change in behavior. He is the author or co-editor of 22 books, including The Wall Street Journal No. 1 business best-seller What Got You Here Won`t Get You There.]
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How many of us devote a thought to the exponential changes that happen around the world? Originally originated in 2006, this is one of those striking presentations that stays alive in my memories.
This is created from the original video made by Karl Fisch and Scott McLeod, makes us think about the rapid transformation happening around us.
Muse On!
There is an advantage when one subscribes to a library. One buys a chance to discover new authors and antiquated books that tell myriad stories. I was so glad that I chanced upon this book titled “Close To The Wind” written by John Harris, which I picked up as an afterthought, lured by the title. Must say I am really enticed by this beautifully penned tome.
Its a story about a debt ridden Italian Couple Joe and Rosa who prefer the capricious Pacific to surrendering their mortgaged houseboat. Aided by their daughter Frankie, a school atlas, a nonfunctional ship engine, penniless condition and derelict instruments they sail to the unknown, hoping to discover an island where they can hide their only means of livelihood, the boat Tina S to safety. Pressed by the need for money, they take an unknown stranger Willie with questionable past for passenger on this sea adventure.
What follows then, is a story of grit, emotion, belief, and love as the passengers discover themselves over the challenging voyage. Little did the older couple know that their antique old boat is no match for the journey that they set themselves ahead. To reach America and have a chance at creating life for Frankie and Willie who fall in love with each other over the wild voyage.
To make the issues worse, the old couple is haunted by the media who thought that their impossible sea adventure makes good headline story, and the police for Willie who committed a murder and is postponing the inevitable capture by discovering himself over the Pacific. Life over the sea becomes a roller coaster ride for these four members who discover love, bonding, temptation, struggle, hurricane, and loss while they struggle for survival with little food and meager money, from the vagaries of the Pacific.
The characters feel so natural that you may wonder if they are conjured from your daily life experiences. Captain Mama is a tower of strength in handling the crisis and her devil may care attitude, positivity and enthusiasm tugs a chord at heart while the evolution of Willie from a wayward ruffian to a responsible person does manage to cheer up your spirits. The ways of God are ironic they say, for Willie sacrifices himself on the face of death to save the family, just a few days after he discovers contentment, lady love and purpose of life.
This post is a result of a desire to list out some of those haphazard thoughts that catch you in randomness in every direction on a weekend, just when you realize you have all the time in the world to be with oneself.
The Regular Weekend Laundry List
Some High Moments
Some Time For Confessions
WORD OF THE DAY
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