On Possessiveness and Love…

7 12 2007

There is once a popular song in Hindi that sings that ‘Life Is A Song Of Love’.. Always made me pause and reflect. In our attempts to discover and reinvent life through the journey of love, guess many have been tugged by this emotion of possessiveness sometime. I hear many times about this rolling out as a candid confession in conversations. Guess everyone might have heard of this perspective, but when I came across it in my mail box, I couldn’t resist posting it. Coz, there are certain lessons and learnings in life, that demand conscious effort from our side to put them to practice.

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I once had a friend who grew to be very close to me. Once when we were sitting at the edge of a swimming pool, she filled the palm of her hand with some water and held it before me, and said this: “You see this water carefully contained on my hand? It symbolizes Love.”

This was how I saw it: As long as you keep your hand gently open and allow it to remain there, it will always be there. However, if you attempt to close your fingers round it and try to posses it, it will spill through the first cracks it finds. This is the greatest mistake that people do when they meet love. They try to posses, own, demand, and expect… and just like the water spilling out of your hand, love will retrieve from you. For love is meant to be free, you cannot change its nature. If there are people you love, allow them to be free beings.

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Sounds such a simple perspective, but how difficult to internalize! I have seen relationships collapse due to a possessiveness overdrive and power struggle. Well, we can never reason out our actions in relationships, but awareness always helps in defining our perspective. Love like joy and cheer is meant to be shared and isn’t limited like a piece of cake. Still, we feel as if we own the person and haggle for our share, how strange!





Picture For Thought..

1 12 2007

Here is a beautiful illustration of sacrifice, that made me pause, think and think..How many times have we done stuff that we don’t really care about, thinking that we have an obligation for it? I could never place my opinion on sacrifices more beautifully than this.





Life is Lost in Race..

4 05 2007

Guess its worth pondering on what are we loosing on in this rat race.. Misguided competition, materialistic pursuits, changing relationships, commonplace goals and diminishing values and rise of timeserver mentality.. All take lion’s share in the rise of noise in our lifestyles..

I often go back to those unadulterated childhood memories in a village where there is a lot of human touch in interactions. A great deal of value is placed in human concern, affection, and sharing, though everyone maintained their boundaries.. Well, here we are, in a border less world, yet we are lonely as ever. Driven by individualism, powered by the new age values of convenience and comfort, we are loosing out on the social interactions. Email, Call, Fax..Inundated by the communication channels, the interaction has become faceless, lacking warmth and touch.

Do we want better cell phones or improved human relations? Do we want increased life span or enhanced quality of life? Bigger homes or space in life? Irony of our times is that we have all the modern comforts at our service and lesser time to enjoy them. We stopped to pause, reflect and appreciate little joys of life and the meaning behind the obvious. As we get swamped and drowned by the new age ideals, the only solace lies in being aware of our actions.

Check these verses which are being circulated as forward.. Worth Contemplating..

THE PARADOX OF OUR TIMES

- Attributed to the Dalai Lama and to George Carlin

Is that we have taller buildings, but shorter tempers
Wider freeways, but narrower viewpoints
We spend more, but we have less
We have bigger houses, but smaller families
More conveniences, but less time
We have more degrees, but less sense
More knowledge, but less judgment
More experts, but more problems
More medicines, but less wellness

We have multiplied our possessions, but reduced our values
We talk too much, love too seldom, and hate too often
We have learnt how to make a living, but not a life
We have added years to life, but not life to years
We’ve been all the way to the moon and back
But have trouble crossing the street to meet the new neighbour
We have conquered outer space, but not inner space
We’ve cleaned up the air, but polluted our soul
We’ve split the atom, but not our prejudice
We’ve higher incomes, but lower morals
We’ve become long on quantity but short on quality

These are the times of tall men, and short character
Steep profits, and shallow relationships
These are the times of world peace, but domestic warfare
More leisure, but less fun; more kinds of food, but less nutrition
These are the days of two incomes, but more divorces
Of fancier houses, but broken homes
It is a time when there is much in the show window
And nothing in the stockroom

A time when technology can bring this letter to you
And a time when you can choose
Either to make a difference…. or just hit, delete.





Beauty of Well Worded Thoughts!

28 04 2007

Talking of those days when I am down and I have shut myself from the world, of those days when I cried in private and put a brave mask to the world, of those days when I lose myself in a book unwilling to face the day.. I have lived the life of an escapist at times! There are times when I felt so uncomfortable to acknowledge or accept that part of me, especially when I retracted into a rugged shell to play the recluse quarantined in my own comfortable solitude. I am breaking from the mould, as I have learned to be patient and accepting of myself, of my choices and actions.

Life’s choices are based on our reactions at that moment. Probably reflecting back, I can always say that I could have handled the moment in a better fashion. Past is always easy to judge, as its comprehended. Yet, things doesn’t look so black and white when one goes through the rigmarole! A friend of mine has beautifully worded my reaction as ‘survival instinct’. It truly made me pause and wonder. What a pertinent phrase to rationalize my actions! The power that well worded observation had on me is beyond expression. It feels as if a new insight dawned on me and I looked through things in a different light! Such is the power of the right words! Well, that doesn’t mean that I hunt for harmonious thoughts to justify my feelings.. :-) Infact, this post is dedicated to the beauty of expression and also to that sweet friend who made my day!





Slow Down Culture

31 01 2007

I simply loved this article! Author Unknown, yet kudos to him!
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It’s been 18 years since I joined Volvo, a Swedish company. Working for them has proven to be an interesting experience. Any project here takes 2 years to be finalized, even if the idea is simple and brilliant. It’s a rule.

Globalized processes have caused in us (all over the world) a general sense of searching for immediate results. Therefore, we have come to posses a need to see immediate results. This contrasts greatly with the slow movements of the Swedish. They, on the other hand, debate, debate, debate, hold x quantity of meetings and work with a slowdown scheme. At the end, this always yields better results.

Said in another words:
1. Sweden is about the size of San Pablo, a state in Brazil.
2. Sweden has 2 million inhabitants.
3. Stockholm, has 500,000 people.
4. Volvo, Escania, Ericsson, Electrolux, Nokia are some of its renowned companies. Volvo supplies the NASA.

The first time I was in Sweden, one of my colleagues picked me up at the hotel every morning. It was September, bit cold and snowy. We would arrive early at the company and he would park far away from the entrance (2000 employees drive their car to work). The first day, I didn’t say anything, either the second or third. One morning I asked, “Do you have a fixed parking space? I’ve noticed we park far from the entrance even when there are no other cars in the lot.” To which he replied, “Since we’re here early we’ll have time to walk, and whoever gets in late will be late and need a place closer to the door. Don’t you think? Imagine my face.

Nowadays, there’s a movement in Europe name Slow Food. This movement establishes that people should eat and drink slowly, with enough time to taste their food, spend time with the family, friends, without rushing. Slow Food is against its counterpart: the spirit of Fast Food and what it stands for as a lifestyle. Slow Food is the basis for a bigger movement called Slow Europe, as mentioned by Business Week.

Basically, the movement questions the sense of “hurry” and “craziness” generated by globalization, fueled by the desire of “having in quantity” (life status) versus “having with quality”, “life quality” or the “quality of being”. French people, even though they work 35 hours per week, are more productive than Americans or British. Germans have established 28.8 hour workweeks and have seen their productivity been driven up by 20%. This slow attitude has brought forth the US’s attention, pupils of the fast and the “do it now!”.

This no-rush attitude doesn’t represent doing less or having a lower productivity. It means working and doing things with greater quality, productivity, perfection, with attention to detail and less stress. It means reestablishing family values, friends, free and leisure time. Taking the “now”, present and concrete, versus the “global”, undefined and anonymous. It means taking humans’ essential values, the simplicity of living.

It stands for a less coercive work environment, more happy, lighter and more productive where humans enjoy doing what they know best how to do. It’s time to stop and think on how companies need to develop serious quality with no-rush that will increase productivity and the quality of products and services, without losing the essence of spirit.

In the movie, Scent of a Woman, there’s a scene where Al Pacino asks a girl to dance and she replies, “I can’t, my boyfriend will be here any minute now”. To which Al responds, “A life is lived in an instant”. Then they dance to a tango.

Many of us live our lives running behind time, but we only reach it when we die of a heart attack or in a car accident rushing to be on time. Others are so anxious of living the future that they forget to live the present, which is the only time that truly exists. We all have equal time throughout the world. No one has more or less. The difference lies in how each one of us does with our time. We need to live each moment. As John Lennon said, “Life is what happens to you while you’re busy making other plans”.

Congratulations for reading till the end of this message. There are many who will have stopped in the middle so as not to waste time in this globalized world.








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