You Are Not The Same Gal Anymore..

11 02 2008

Ouch! That innocent observation did hurt! And it pained much more as I know it has a grain of truth.

Agreed that I lost a little bit of peace of mind in trying to be a rat in the race.
Agreed that am not connecting with those people who really matter in my life.
Agreed that the dreamer in me went on a strike to protest my callous indifference.

Mea Culpa.. 😦

No time to watch the sunbeams painting the sky in yellow and gold.
No time to bask in the moonshine from my portico in the afterglow of a fulfilling day.
No time to relish in fresh morning breeze swaying over my silkened hair.

Yet, my dear pal, let me offer this political explanation. In this age full of adrenaline and confusion, I feel as if I am chasing illusions and grandiose dreams – of trying to make it big in life. This rat race metrics can make me quite dazed especially if I have to conform to the trite conventional standards. In this run to nowhere, I am missing the acknowledgment of the present and the beauty of small things that paint life in infinitesimal detail. Yet, to confess, I am working on it and be patient with me.

I change roz roz, and this is time or a phase in life where am grappling the unknown and the darkness. Yet, as a realist, let me acknowledge this as well. I believe that eternal optimism is any day better than persistent pessimism. Let me connect with myself as life seems to be sweeping me in deluge!


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4 responses

12 02 2008
chennairamblings

There is no need for guilt
No one remains the same, its a part of growing up
I would be worried instead if someone told me I had not changed at all, it means I am standing still and not going ahead

12 02 2008
sai

hmmmm……You change and you transform, you create and recreate, you discover and are discovered, You cry and you laugh,You die a thousand deaths in a single moment and yet live to tell the tale, You will feel like a rat in a deluge, but my dear girl i know you are someone who will swim against the current and reach your destination, and if that basic structure of yours remains ( the spirit ) the changes will come and go and you will Grow….that comment dont take it too hard we all change i guess….

13 02 2008
rashmi

hey……change is the only constant in life……feel its for a change…and it will be… smile!!!!!!!!!!

14 02 2008
nrsl

@ CR
Well said dear. Yet, I don’t think guilt troubled me, but I thought that comment deserved a thought.
@ sai
Wow. Well said dear.
@ rashmi
Thanks for spreading some smile. Much needed.

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