Complexities of Unrequited Love..

30 04 2007

That can sure cause quite a turmoil in the heart. My idea of love is still evolving, and probably it would enhance with passage of time as I learn from heart’s journeys. Yet, coursing through the experiences of life, entangled in the tales of love has made me appreciate the labyrinthine maneuvering of tortuous emotions.

Makes me wonder how the definitions of love change with time. At times, it could be courting, flirting or a simple companionship. It could be attraction, affection or an intrinsic need for completeness. Sounds quite like an convoluted journey, isn’t it?

Living through the tales of unrequited love made me wonder what creates that plethora of entangled emotions. Is that incompatible expectations, or unjustified emotions? Is it incongruous personalities or mismatched priorities? Whatever could be the real reason, they sure leave a trail of broken feelings, of bleeding hearts exposed for hurt…

Rise in love, fall in love, broken hearts and mended feelings.. Cliches really have a way of putting things in a poetic fashion! We may turn up cynical and may put in practical outlook, we may lock ourselves in shells with once bitten twice shy attitude, or go with the traditional flow. We may even lick those wounds in private and avow never to trust or place ourselves in vulnerable situations! Its interesting to go through the emotional roller coaster as we come out stronger, richer and wiser after the experience.

Love is enchanting experience and our entire life rolls in the process of discovering it. So what if a prospective partner doesn’t reciprocate your tender feelings? Caught in the spell of love is magical enough. Adoring expectantly, acting irrational, waiting upon for hours, getting all decked up, walking in the clouds, reading poetry together, getting bewitched by the expressive eyes, awaiting approval, spending hours on phones, those times of missed calls and long messages, small fights and big make ups, teasing from friends and crib sessions.. Don’t they form a treasured collection of cherished memories?

Live in the moment, savor the experience, sour higher in the depth of the emotions and learn to relish life in totality. Appreciate the experience for the heck of it! Imagine how boring life would be, if everything happens the way we wish it to be..There ain’t no charm in predictability! Requited or unrequited, there is a purpose hidden beneath.. Our soul goes deep like those dark ancient rivers as we wade through highs and lows of life. Well, I hear my dreamy self rambling again!



8 responses

30 04 2007

hi rani, unrequited love hurts more than anything, i know it. though a foolish love, i too fell in love with a man. no, i fell in love with the words sent by a malayali in Gujarat. he propsed to me without even seeing me. then when i sent him my pic, he left me for someone more beautiful. he had the audacity to tell to my face that i was ugly and his parents would never allow him to marry me. surely that love was nothing like reading poetry together, dressing up and wating eagerly for one never changes. it is lovers who change. or rather thier attitude taht changes. in one second he could forget my sincere love for him; he could forget how i prayed and cried for him when he fell seriously sick. well thats what life and love is abt. but it has not destroyed my confidence in love. i am sure i will love and be loved by a manwho is thousand times better than him. today an unrequited love creates no complexities in my heart. rather i laugh at it.

2 05 2007

Hi Rema, I can empathize with you on that regard. Consider yourself blessed that you are aware of his priorities before you went ahead! Guess all that experience added a bit of learning to make u what you are.

I couldn’t resist quoting Elizabeth barret Browning here, as her longing for that true love is expressed in this beautiful sonnet..

“If thou must love me, let it be for nought
Except for love’s sake only. Do not say
I love her for her smile–her look–her way
Of speaking gently,–for a trick of thought
That falls in well with mine, and certes brought
A sense of ease on such a day–

For these things in themselves, Belovèd, may
Be changed, or change for thee,–and love, so wrought,
May be unwrought so. Neither love me for
Thine own dear pity’s wiping my cheek dry,–
A creature might forget to weep, who bore
Thy comfort long, and lose thy love thereby!
But love me for love’s sake, that evermore
Thou may’st love on, through love’s eternity.”

People change, values change and love changes too.. Time has such power! The inner fighter spirit never dies. We laugh, cry, take things in stride and move on for new adventures! I have never been through the pangs of unrequited love. Guess that gives me an outsider perspective! Wish u the best in your journey of love, and life..

8 05 2007

hey poet….i got the import of the entire write up and yes i am aware of the things said here, very well aware and i try my best to think so in the said fashion, but, alas!!! such is the fate of a man who knows he is being yet wants to be dumb for the heck of it….hahaha you cannot correct someone who is thus inclined to self pity…like i always keep telling u “self pity is very tempting” indeed … here I am , all almost all cured of my malady, but it doesnt matter i guess that i am loking at the medicine after being cured of the ailment. to have a positive outlook inlife , i repeat for the Nth time it needs a constant working on….

6 06 2008

Sometimes unrequited love haunts you longer than you can imagine…and at times when the love is pure, dauntless and unadulterated, it brings the two souls together without doubt…for what is meant to be is to be!!
Tested and proven…

Thanks for writing such a thoughtful post.

10 06 2009

She broke my heart 4 years ago.

I will not let anyone do the same to me again.

10 06 2009

5 years ago, in high school, she found out that i liked her.

We stopped being friends. She refused to acknowledge that i even existed, except perhaps as the “creepy stalker”.

I could take rejection- love isn’t always requited, i understand. But losing our friendship was what truly hurt the most. I went kind of crazy for those 2 years, torn between conflicting desires. Yes, i wanted to restore our friendship. But i also didn’t want to frighten her. I tried to achieve both aims. Both eluded me.

I went my way. She went hers.

I lived down 2 years of gossip and bitching. I could never enter the same room as her without some jackass looking at me sideways and muttering. One of her friends even came up to me and told me i was too short for her. I can understand if i’m not nice enough or whatever- at least i can do something about it. But not tall enough? Geez, talk about shallow.

She got all enamoured with another guy. My friend from elementary school days. As if losing our friendship wasn’t bad enough, i had to see her get all sappy over this guy. Well, i wasn’t surprised. He was everything i was not. Charming, religious, sociable.

At the end of our final exams, i wanted to say goodbye to her so badly. However, she had one more paper than i. I did not want to upset her by talking to her before she’d finished.

4 years ago, she finished her last paper and walked out of my life.

She broke my heart 4 years ago.

I will not let anyone do the same to me again.

11 01 2011

Love is perplex, an illusion at best. Can one love two persons at the same time or is it a simple confusion of the soul. What is love? Is it loving the simplest things or admiring the greatest attributes? Does love grow or fades with time? So many questions and answers, yet we seek the least compromising answer.

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