Marriage- A funny role play!

10 01 2005

People marry because they want to become secure.. To feel that they can come home to someone.. And also they own certain rights on the other person which guarantees a certain commitment. I have absolutely no issues on the reasons as to why people marry and I do believe in the institution of the marriage, but I just want to be a little bit critical about it.

Marriage becomes intolerable when people cant transgress the boundaries of the relationships and do a role play which may not gel with their real personalities. Yes I do agree that rules and unwritten norms do exist but then one has to know when to come out of them. If wife has to take the role of a wife and husband has to act like one, wife has to please the other person and she has to adjust and mould according to him. And the husband bechara has to appear strong, and he has to defend his territory ,no? That’s the basic reason why men don’t like to come into kitchen- that’s wife’s job. The guy may feel as if he is ran down by 1000 trucks, but he has to put a brave face and be pleasant, why is that hypocrisy? What do one ultimately expect of life? The big joke is he thinks its because he loves his family, which is okay with me, but he ultimately deceives himself with an entirely wrong notion of love where he actually wants control over his family!

Even I long to feel secure, I don’t want to lose my identity, independence and freedom: My spirit and enthusiasm which basically define my identity. May be I live in an idealistic world fantasizing that there is a person for me who will respect my identity. But if I like to have a realistic picture, is it really possible? I find that hope is a painful thing as it paints a romantic picture out of draconian surroundings.

Well,love should make life worthwhile..You grow by it. You learn the fun of giving and taking. One has to be aware of the role play and the unmentioned boundaries they set for themselves. Understanding the unwritten norms leads to awareness and helps in creating mature relationships. Am I being dreamy? If so that’s the way I am!



One response

27 07 2010

My name is Funmilayo, i junior sociologist that wills to learn, please can you educate me on these topics?
1. Explain the important role play by marriage in a human group?
2. Explain succintly with reference to contributions from some scholars what culture prescribes and its distinguishing characteristics. Thanks for your assistant.


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