In A Glass Paradise, I Shed..

all those miseries that I have seen for the future through those unspoken tears rolling over my eyes..

What hurt me was not the indifference of the world but the misinterpretation of my pal. Or is it that I am afraid to face the truth? Why do I feel the need or urge to justify myself, or explain myself that I am not what they think. Yet, I gave up.. Silence is the best answer for all those judgments that are meted out and those expectations that are set on me.

Coz, still I don’t have an easy answer to the mystery called me. Yet, its nice to have people around to whom I can be as nasty when I want to and pass all my moody zingers whenever I like..

Dunno why, yet its nice to to feel that I can still cry. I guess its ok to cry even when there is no reason. Its okay to bare one’s heart for those little disappointments and soul shattering experiences in life. They make me feel more human, especially when am tired of playing the big girl. Thank you tears, for being there when it mattered most. Hear me out, oh Mr. Gloominess.. You can visit me anytime, but only for a moment. Only to show me how wonderful the blue sky or the rosy tinted glasses are.. So do remember when u drop by my door for a brief hello.

Everyone thinks I am at a tricky phase of life. When it isn’t so? Things would seem as dark or light as I want them to be. Nothing shatters a dream than a compromise. I believe, hope and pray everyday to not see the light of a day when I had to negotiate with my life. I guess its tough life being a dreamer. Even in a glass paradise, my eyes seek the vision of limitless blue sky and a bright rainbow. I can’t really help myself. That eternal optimist survives!

Expectations n Relationships!

It may happen with us that I may want the company of the person without whom I cant live or my life may seem incomplete. But it can also be true that later I may feel constrained in the relationship or my illusions may get shattered. Well all I want to say is the real culprit here is my mind. It makes expectations, and creates an aura or image of an ideal person whom I want, without any connection to the real person. And all the life I may try to fit that person into that image. No wonder there are ripples in the relationship. Here what I have to consider first is whether I am flexible and open enough to consider and understand the person as he is? Or else that perfect marriage with a perfect person would be nothing but a MIRAGE. Think about it!

Actually, expectations in relationships increase because of repeated behavior of the other person and also on your own emotional attachment with her. But,when you have expectations, you are bound to be either satisfied or dissatisfied. The way you react will alter the relationship, and may even constrain it when you try to restrain or bound the other person. Well, I guess you can be aware of the expectations you have and hence so you can actually discover the joy of the relationship.

Everyone may share different perspectives, but I can at least examine my own assumptions as I don’t think that expectations form the basis of relationships. Well, there may be an inherent need to associate with others, still will it lead to expectations? May be I have to look in myself..