Today..

There is a curious longing for psychological shutdown.. Dunno why. Is this a mood of nothingness? Or a phase of psychosomatic illness? Must be a severe affect of Monday Blues.. Life sounds so evenly balanced now, with full of chaos everywhere! How I long for the warmth of my bed and a cozy nap!

Work Life Balance..

One of the most quoted phrases in HR lingo.. And what a powerful myth to dream about! Balance.. Hmm.. Isn’t work a part of life? And how easily we use this, as if we can apportion our time between work and life. Somehow I have always felt that the more I call something work or job, the less I am interested in doing it..

Whenever I think of this phrase in particular, some of the assignments that I did as a part of Indigenous Management course in IMDR flashes in my mind. I have interacted with a lot of people in indigenous industries and its impressive to observe how their work is entwined in their life. When we bunch of students went and saw their work locations, what caught out eye was the pride that radiated in their faces when they were displaying their wares. What struck me was how much love and purpose they could sense in their life and how closely connected are their personal and work lives. Their career instills a sense of purpose into their personal life.

How much ever I wish to compartmentalize my life, its not always possible. Whatever tensions I face in my professional environment rubs off in my personal space. I never seem to attain that magic balance. Life for me is intense and I plan to explore it to the fullest. Work is fun and focus. Either I love the work I do or do the work I love. Period! And where there is love, fun and a sense of enjoyment, there seems a lack of caution, control and balance.. Don’t you think so?

Fighting Emptiness..

This is one post which I am waiting to write since past four months yet couldn’t make it as the call of the emptiness is weighing too heavy on my pen. Suddenly I found myself caught in a thoughtless abyss, and I went on treading the fretful path! Wondering about future, managing other’s expectations, taking the easier route and loosing touch of the present…I spoke to my friends and colleagues. Must say that I heard a similar echo everywhere. Struggle for success, fight against unknown competitors, striving to give the best has dwindled the quality of life. Most of the friends I spoke to has nothing more to discuss than job, career and role. And a few had everything to say other than about work! Blogging didn’t engage me and the distance grew between my diary and me. I felt as if I am being sucked in to a crib club. It’s been a truly mad three months for me as a longed for a wild break. I wanted something more. A new challenge, an exciting trip, or a fresh role may be! I thought I had learnt whatever I could and that dampened my spirit. And then started Sowmya’s trials at work. I became less efficient always considering work as duty, and ended up in a self pity soup. Until, realization dawned on me. Am in a unique role where I could do whatever I can, learn whatever I can muster and explore my potential. I had my cake of corporate mktg, event mgmt, business analysis, idea management, and what not? It’s just a gloomy and lonely spell I was under. Wondering about my personal status as a woman and a professional status in life and how do I manage my parents expectations along with that. I took a 10 day break, went home and had a minor break, came back and studied banking and finished a couple of certifications. Took to MS Office 2007, which just simplified my task and opened new avenues in presentations. Currently, am working on a couple of proactive proposals in a rough way. Life is good, as long as it had something new to savor, learn and experience!

Flow of life..

I have this feeling that it been ages since I wrote something nice. I seriously don’t know what to post and I consider it serious! Life has become so simple and predictable out here that there is monotony creeping in. Its been almost four months since I came to Chennai and I already feel as if I have settled down. I guess I got adjusted in the office life as well. Everything looks so comfortable, isn’t it? Still I can’t explain this strange feeling of intellectual amnesia. When I was in IMDR, we used to discuss about dream jobs. An article written by my senior denying the existence of a myth called “dream job” caught my attention. I wondered about it then. I got placed in my dream company and when I look back now to those days, I know how true it is. A dream can never be a job, atleast for me. And, when there is a purpose or an aspiration chasing you, it would never be a job.

I remember reading a book titled “elephants and flees”. The author compares the huge and heavily manned organizations as Elephants. How true! Working for a multinational manning around 50 thousand personnel is indeed complex, especially in a mammoth IT company where the hierarchies are not defined properly. Guess the charm has worn out! Life has become too comfortable even to crib, and rhythm it has achieved is not particularly to my liking. Need more action and variety!!

A few days back, I registered myself on my college website and was surprised to receive a reply back. The desire to see the outside was high during those college days and now, I long for that cocoon type comfort again!