I have always loved Fairy tales. The Cinderella, Prince Charming, and the Knight in Shining Armour.. As I grew up, I resisted all those hard practicality knocks and held on to those dreams.. Somehow I always felt that there is this ideal soul mate made to order for me, who complements and completes me in the journey of love and life. Its tough at times to keep on hoping, not to melt those unspoken dreams at the test of times. Whenever I trade off those pieces of dreams for fragments of reality, it leaves a hollow in heart to accept that in life those little dreams may not take shape at all. That dream home can turn out to be a loveless cramped apartment, those peace filled surroundings are in actuality dull roads filled with roaring vehicles, that picture perfect world will end up as a portrait, and that ideal Mr. Right could turnout to be a frog..
Sometimes people can actually mess up and trample those treasure trove of yearnings and mock our dreams that we hold so dear. How I wish I can curse with all my might and force them to walk in my shoes to understand the hurt that they carelessly inflict. Sharing life, vision, dreams and memories with someone are like placing a hammer in the hands of people and begging them to hit us back. Yet we trust and hope with all fervor, suffer the wounds in private and face the world with renewed twinkle in eyes and rigor in action. Aren’t we amazing?
Yes just as Richard Kincaid says ”The old dreams were good dreams, they didn’t work out , but I am glad I had them”.
For now, its time for some reality bites! :-)
“We wait all these years to find someone who understands us, I thought, someone who accepts us as we are, someone with a wizard’s power to melt stone to sunlight, who can bring us happiness in spite of trials, who can face our dragons in the night, who can transform us into the soul we choose to be. Just yesterday I found that magical Someone is the face we see in the mirror: It’s us and our homemade masks.”
When the glamour [of one’s marriage] wears off, or merely works a bit thin, they think they have made a mistake, and that the real soul-mate is still to find. The real soul-mate too often proves to be the next sexually attractive person that comes along. Someone whom they might indeed very profitably have married, if only – . Hence divorce, to provide the ‘if only’. And of course they are as a rule quite right: they did make a mistake. Only a very wise man at the end of his life could make a sound judgement concerning whom, amongst the total possible chances, he ought most profitably to have married! Nearly all marriages, even happy ones, are mistakes: in the sense that almost certainly (in a more perfect world, or even with a little more care in this very imperfect one) both partners might have found more suitable mates. But the ‘real soul-mate’ is the one you are actually married to. You really do very little choosing: life and circumstances do most of it (though if there is a God these must be His instruments, or His appearances).
- J.R.R. Tolkien, Letter #43